The Secret to A Selfie That Can Make Us Look AND Feel Great

The right background, the right lighting, the right pose, the right makeup can all add up to a simply stunning selfie... but how does posting the BEST selfie affect your happiness?

Want to know Best Practices for Taking The Most Attractive Selfies?

We've gathered a list as well as all the top apps for re-touching and adding graphics and fun filters to your posts at the end of this story, but first there's few things to know about the downside of Selfie Obsession.

Selfie posing, clicking and posting can really do a number on your self-esteem.

There have been many studies of about the drawbacks of using social media.  It's been linked to depression and it's why we often recommend a daily unplug from all social media. This study of over a 1,000 college undergrads, found Facebook use was associated with greater social comparison and greater self-objectification, which, in turn, was each related to lower self-esteem, poorer mental health, and greater body shame.

FOMO and Comparison Aside--What about Just Taking A Good Selfie and Sharing It? Isn't That the Fun Part of Social Media?

Apparently, not necessarily-- Especially if you're a young woman.

An entire Study was devoted to one thing: how young women felt about themselves when

1. They didn't take a selfie at all
2. They took a selfie and posted it to Instagram or Facebook
3. They took a selfie, retouched it, and then posted it to Instagram or Facebook.

The study did a detailed dive assessing how women in each group felt about themselves and assessing changes in mental and emotional states...

Using A Filter to Look More Attractive in the Selfie Made Them Feel . . .

Better than posting the unedited shots, apparently! The women who re-touched felt a bit less anxiety and more confidence then the group who didn't get the retouching opportunity. But it turns out that taking a selfie and posting it, even when women took time and effort to re-take, retouch and filter the selfie, still resulted in more anxiety and less confidence than not taking or posting a selfie at all.

Can you say p-r-e-s-s-u-r-e?  I mean, I get it. As humans we're wired for connection, and in this digital age, social media is one of our primary ways of connecting. We want to represent ourselves well, so we can get the appreciation and interaction that we crave-- and the pressure to do so can make it feel like the online version of ourselves-- the one being presented to the virtual world for engagement-- is the version that matters the most.

Since Selfie is Not Going Away, Let's Look At Ways to Make Them A Happier Experience. 

The Gratitude Selfie

If we know that Selfies can cause anxiety, yet we still want and need to post them, doing a selfie with gratitude in mind might be an answer.

Having a Reason to Take a selfie-always makes for a better selfie.  Having a great day? In a great spot? With great friends? New hair style or outfit or lip-color you want to share?  Plus-up these reasons for taking a selfie with an expression of Gratitude,
"So grateful to be in this beautiful place." "Thanks Mandy for the cute cut and bangs!"  You get the idea.

My favorite selfies are my Thank You Selfies--like when someone sends me something and I take a selfie with it or wearing it. It feels good on many levels.  Like my Gratitude For This Lovely Shirt Selfie Here- I posted it to say thank you to the sender :)

"God Gave You The Gift of 66,400 seconds today. Have You Used One To Say Thank You?"   William Arthur Ward

• Expressing Thanks makes you feel good--And that's another key, take a selfie when you FEEL Good. Others can perceive our feelings and we certainly can look back at a photo and remember exactly how we felt when we took a selfie. If you're sharing a serious moment-be real about that too.  Best to avoid "fake" happy selfies.

Here are some other tips for Selfies That Look and Make You Feel GOOD

• Know your angles.  We all have our best side. Take a few and find yours.
• Selfie-experts say look up, extend your head away from your neck, relax your mouth(?)!! That all seems like it would cause anxiety to me- but if you have the time and want to try-go for it!

• Lighting is just about everything: I watch my gorgeous daughter pose for selfies and I love how she glides in a circle to find the best light.

• The sunset magic golden hour is most flattering.

• If the sun is bright and you're squinting, but you're background is too amazing to pass up: get the shot ready and then close your eyes and look directly up into the sun, look down at the camera and open your eyes, they will be relaxed for a few seconds. Snap the photo.

• If you're doing duo selfies, give the camera to the person with the longest arm.
• Using a filter or re-touching a photo may make you feel a bit (see the study above) more confident so if you want to do it, don't let the stigma of "retouching" stop you.  Just try and keep it real.  Real is often the critical component missing from social media, so keep that in mind when you make your decision.
• Facetune is a popular retouching App. $3.99 for no in-app ads. Use only if you must, it's one more app that's getting your personal data.
• Stay away from Airbrush. Privacy Policy is subject to the laws of China which does not provide the standards of data protection that the EU has mandated.
• Adobe Spark Post lets you add graphics and filters to your photos--this one was done in Adobe Spark Post.

Remember, these Apps get access to your information and photos! Use only if you must! Even when you delete your information before all the privacy policies of the above apps note that they may retain your content.  Be careful what content you give them!

• Take your photos while your smartphone is in Airplane mode. That way you won't be exposed to wireless EMF radiation.

• Or/And use a selfie stick! Seriously, it's the safest way to get a good shot and avoid the EMF altogether.  Here's a good one:

And don't forget--keep that selfie Camera Covered to protect you from silly apps that can and do have the ability to control your camera and take a picture when you're really not ready.  Our Creepblockers do the job in a super-fun way

Any other great Selfie ideas?  Send them via comments and we will add them to the Selfie Tip section!

Thank you for reading and sharing this information and our website.  We really appreciate you! 

Be Well!

August